Now Where Did I Put That Book...

Dear Journal,

It's 4:45am and I can't sleep again...I had another Vision...Nightmare...Memory.

It was so vivid...I was writing in a  very old journal filled with newspaper clippings, leaves, music lyrics...Beautiful things...Overlooking a beautiful scenic landscape high in the snowy mountains. I was adding a picture and s few ticket stubs for a ski lodge to a journal.

While Robin, sitting beside me on a lovely couch, wrote in a book filled with words, there was the smell of hot chocolate and cinnamon in the air. I turned to her and kissed her passionately and asked her what she was writing.

She replied that it was her journal...She had been keeping a record of everything.

Then the scene changed.

There was a fire in a church...The pews burned as little devilish things scratched my flesh...My back seared with pain and I turned back to see what was causing me so much pain..

Wings. Wings were sprouting from my back.

Great bone like protrusions of flesh, starting to form...Then Israel was there slaying the impish demons with a great shinning sword...Caleb helped to support me along with Robin as I bled on the floor of the church.

"However this ends..." I whispered to Caleb, trying to make sure Robin didn't hear. "You take care of her, you got me? You're a good guy..." He nodded in acknowledgement a conflicted look appeared on his face.

"Robin...Whatever happens...I'm sorry..." She told me that it was okay, and with a worried look helped me down the stairs to the basement.

 I wanted to tell her I loved her, I wanted to beg her forgiveness, but I knew that it was folly...

The only thing I could do to help her, to show her how much I wanted to change, was by finishing this.

Permanently.

With a renewed determination, I spoke aloud shrugging them off of my sweat and blood covered form. "Alright," I said stepping into the Circle on the floor. "Let's end this."

That's about when I awoke and figured I should write it down...Even know the memory escapes me...It's still hard to remember it all.

Whatever they did, worked wonders.

I think those books...My journal and Robin's Diary...Those are the answers to a lot of the questions I keep asking...If only I could find them.

But I really can't remember where I put it!

GAH!

I know it's stupid to keep spinning my wheels on this so, I think I'll get my ass to school.

Get some coffee, maybe breakfast.Perhaps the drive will clear my head?

-V